Archive for June, 2013

If they really wanted to defend marriage, they should have tried outlawing divorce.

Otherwise, no one has yet adequately explained how one couple’s marriage has any affect on another couple’s marriage in any way.

Well, unless they’re swingers… but pretty sure DOMA didn’t outlaw that, either.

Given the name, things I WOULD have expected the Defense of Marriage Act to actually address:

Marriage counseling (as, of course, a free, tax paid initiative to prevent divorce)
Financial counseling (as finances are one of the major reasons for divorce still, I believe?)

Because really, if what you’re after is to defend the “Biblical” definition of marriage, then the following are all legal and moral:

Marriage to your half sister (Abraham and Sarah)
Sex outside of marriage to your wife’s handmaiden (Abraham and Hagar)
Marriage to your wife’s sister (Jacob, Rachel, and Leah)|
Sex outside of marriage to your wife’s handmaidens reinforced (Jacob, Bilhah, and Zilpah)
Marriage to the girl you raped, but only if she wasn’t already engaged (Deuteronomy)
Marriage to the daughters of the people you just defeated/killed in battle (Deuteronomy again)
Marriage to 700 wives (and 300 concubines) (Solomon)

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to hold the Bible up to modern moral standards, only pointing out that modern moral standards are more often not found in the Bible.

In fact, the only place where the bible actually dictates that a man should have only one wife is in the New Testament letters, and specifically for church leaders, not applied to all laymen.  The idea that marriage is between only one man and one woman, that they choose one another themselves, and that it has anything to do with love is a rather modern concept, certainly not the ‘Traditional’ nor the ‘Biblical’ definition of the word.

The traditional definition of marriage is much closer to:

One man, and as many women as he wishes and is able to afford, purchased from their father like property, or arranged by the parents of the couple, often without the couple having ever seen one another prior to the wedding.  Whereafter the woman is now considered the man’s property.

And while that is certainly far more historical and traditional, it really comes down to: marriage was defined by the cultures in which it existed, and there is no *one* traditional definition.  In some cultures, homosexual marriage really was allowed.  In some cultures, a woman could take more than one husband.  In some cultures, marriage for love was celebrated.  But not in all.  There is no *one* definition of marriage to be changed.

So really?  All those people who whine about who is changing traditional definitions are doing far more to change the traditional definition themselves.


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Indigenous people.  There can be no argument – let me rephrase:  no *serious* argument – that they have gotten just about the worst end of any stick that ever was.

But wait… everyone is indigenous somewhere, right?  I mean, I’m not dismissing the genocide and other attrocities that have been perpetuated on Native Americans, Australian Aborigines, New Zealand Maori, Mayan tribes, Sami and Inuit peoples… the list literally goes on.

But the term indigenous seems to be… a bit… disingenuous.  EVERYONE is part of an indigenous people group, indigenous somewhere.  If you want to really argue semantics, the whole of the human race is indigenous to Africa (though Neanderthals seem to throw the monkey wrench in those works).

Okay, point is, when people discuss the issues of indigenous peoples, it always makes me stop and think, wait… if I’m not from here, where am I from?  Here being, of course, the only place on Earth I’ve ever known.  I’m not part of the indigenous people of the Pacific Northwest.  The closest I can get to that distinction is my brother in law.

(as an aside, have you ever stopped and realized, the Pacific Northwest is Canada’s Southwest?  Kinda blows the mind, don’t it.)

My grandparents’ parents from one branch came from Sweden.  I am not indigenous to Sweden.  I’ve never seen the country, I don’t know the language (however similar it is to English) and I know even less about the culture itself.  I don’t know what the traditional dress or folk songs are.  Ethnically I have some Swede in me.  I am not Swedish, however.

I have a bit more Irish/Scottish in me, but see above: I don’t know Gaelic, nor have I ever been to Scotland or Ireland, nor do I know anything about them beyond the typical (or rather, stereotypical) haggis, St. Patrick’s Day, kilts, and whiskey.

I have some ethnic roots in Ireland/Scotland, though the Scottish side I believe is actually Dutch, and then the Dutch were really just the Norse who settled there, and the Norse… And hell, the Norse settled Sweden, too, so I’m Norse.  Where did they come from?

I mean I could say yay, Thor and Loki and mead and Vikings and long boats… surely THOSE are mine, right?  I mean, I know a little bit about them, right?  Well, I at least know enough to roll my eyes at the Marvel movies (enjoyed them, though I did) because they completely messed up the mythology of the characters and why on earth were Norse gods skipping around New Mexico, of all places!?

But no, I know something about the Norse, but it’s all academic and trivia.  I may be ethnically Norse, but I don’t I belong to the Norse culture, nor does it belong to me.  It’s someone else’s culture that I am interested in because if you go far enough back in my family tree you’ll run into people who *were* culturally Norse… but that still doesn’t make it mine.  Not MINE mine.  Not something I feel and identify with.

Because I’m from here.  This is my home.  This is the only place I’ve ever known.  This is where I was raised, where I recognize the seasons not by the calendar but by the garden, where I know the names of the creeks and can recognize the trees and flowers and animals, and know when to expect the hummingbirds and the elk.  This is where I understand the relationship between the snow in the mountains and the river in summer.  This is where I take my shoes off and walk the earth.  This is where the sun and the rain know where to find me, and where I understand how the society around me works.  (or rather, I don’t, but I make a better pretense of it.)

This is the only place I know.

I recognize the pain that my brother in law has faced in his life, the pain his people have felt in being pushed into reservations, in having their culture destroyed, their children taken away, their language outlawed, their land stolen.

I recognize I live on land that shouldn’t be mine.  I recognize I live next to the indigenous people who were put on reservations to ‘make room’ for those who came before me.

I recognize there are people who believe I have no right to be here.  This isn’t my home.  This isn’t where I belong.

There are people who love to spew the old “Go back to Africa” or “Go back to China” or whathaveyou racist nonsense.  Rightfully, I could be the object of such hate, but where would I go back to?  Where *do* I belong?

If not here… where?

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To be fair, that last one – Grace Kelly @ADobTrack – does have a point.

After all, I’m highly upset that SHE is commenting on who sings the United States National Anthem. Clearly from Europe…


Seriously, people? Are we really still doing this?

No More Race

I swear I think some people need to be required to get a license to use the Internet. Following the Internet ugliness over the Cheerios commercial that dared show a mixed family, the Internet racists went crazy when a Latino kid, an Hispanic-American, sang the national anthem at the 3rd game of the NBA Finals.

Racist Tweets

And there is plenty more where that came from as you can see here.

But the kid and his family responded with class to the whole thing, pointing out that he IS an American, from San Antonio actually. And kudos to the Spurs for bringing him back last night to stick it to those idiots by having him sing the anthem all over again. Only thing better would have been if he also held up a box of Cheerios at the end.

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Because it seems like a lot of people still don’t understand the word, I’d like to explain.


Gay is *not*:

Stupid, lame, undesirable, effeminate, butch, less than, harmful, something to be feared, a choice, an insult, a burn, a political stance, a religious stance, flamboyance, a style of speech, a manner of walking, hugging your best friend, showing emotion, touching the same gender, experimenting with the same gender, playing with traditionally ‘other’ gendered toys, dressing in traditionally ‘other’ gendered clothing, having a body that does not conform to a socially defined sex, having a mind that does not conform to your biological socially defined sex.


Gay does *not equal*:

Child molester, everyone after a few drinks, gender, sex, harassment, transgendered, transvestite, rape.


Gay means:

A sexual orientation, attraction to the same gender.


Things that can’t be gay:

Music, movies, tv shows, commercials, haircuts, clothes, expressions, school, tests, work, things you don’t like, things you don’t agree with, things, situations (unless there is actual, complicit, desired same-gender activity occurring).


Things that can be gay:

People who are attracted to the same gender, situations where same-gender attraction stuff is going on.  Gay pride parades are, unquestionably, gay.  🙂


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